Are You in Love?

Love is a huge part of human life. It is a topic that has been debated in philosophy, literature and religion for millennia and continues to be of interest across the disciplines from anthropology and psychology to biology and neuroscience. It can be a difficult concept to define and it can feel different for each person, but there are some common threads that run through the experiences of those who say they are in love.

A defining characteristic of love is trust. It is the basis for a strong bond that is built over time through shared goals and values and is nurtured by honesty. This is one of the biggest reasons why communication is so important in a loving relationship.

When you fall in love, your priorities change. You might become more concerned with your health and wellbeing. You may also be more generous and less self-centered, as you want to make sure your partner is happy. You might even want to spend more money on them than you would a close friend. This shows that you care deeply about them and their well-being.

You might also find yourself being more adventurous and willing to try new things, because your partner enjoys them too. This could include activities you wouldn’t have done before such as visiting a museum or going to a new restaurant. It’s like you have your own personal cheerleader in your corner and everything seems possible. This is a feeling of protection and security that can give you the confidence to overcome challenges in your life.

There is also a form of love that involves lust and short-term feelings based on chemical reactions in the brain. This can be experienced between friends, or as a parent and child. It is often a feeling of excitement and attraction, a desire for sex and the desire to be around the person you are in love with. This can be a very pleasurable experience but it does not last and you have as much control over it as you have over a sudden bout of food poisoning or a hangover.

Many people claim to be in this kind of love, but the truth is that lust can have its place in a healthy relationship if it is balanced with a commitment to respect and support your partner’s values, interests and goals. When that happens, the love can last a lifetime and is worth the effort of being honest with yourself about your needs and how you are feeling.

Love is a complex emotion that encompasses many things, from emotional attachment to a sense of belonging. It can be influenced by a wide range of factors, such as misunderstandings and life changes. But with communication, understanding and devotion, it can endure even through the toughest of times. This article was produced by Deakin University’s The Conversation AU with funding from the Australian Research Council. It is published under a Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 International licence.