How to Define Love in Fiction
Throughout the ages philosophers, prophets and poets have struggled to define love. Scientists have been less comfortable studying it, but in recent decades they’ve loosened up a bit and started to understand the mechanics of love better. They’ve found that it is a complex emotion and can take on many forms, from the bond between family members to the camaraderie between friends to the butterflies of romantic feelings.
Some people believe that love is one of the fundamental human needs, along with belonging and self-esteem. When these needs are addressed, people tend to feel happier and more fulfilled in their lives. Some researchers also think that love can transform a person, helping them to become their best selves.
When you love someone, your brain is flooded with certain chemicals. These are the same hormones that make you feel good around a crush, your best friend or your spouse. They are designed to keep you coming back for more of the thing that’s making you feel these good feelings – in this case, spending time with that person. But that’s not necessarily all that love is, and the notion that it only lasts if you have “chemistry” or that you can only fall in and out of it is misleading.
For example, a sibling might have some differences with his or her brother or sister, but love binds them together tightly. The same is true of parents and their children – they may have different opinions or habits, but the love they share for each other is strong. Other forms of love include mutual aid, affection and altruism – a boundless love for humanity that can help us rise above our selfish tendencies.
Writing about love requires you to get inside the head of your characters and convey their emotions. To do this, it helps to have an understanding of how love works in real life. Research the topic by talking to experts in the field, such as relationship counselors and therapists. You can also read articles and watch movies that portray various facets of love and relationships. This research will help you show your readers how your characters’ experiences with love are similar to the ones they have themselves.
If you’re looking for love, try to focus on emotional and intellectual connections instead of just physical attraction. Expanding your social circles and taking on new hobbies can increase the chances of meeting someone who shares your interests and values. Be sure to be honest with yourself, and don’t settle for anything that makes you feel bad about yourself or is toxic to your mental health. Bad relationships can leave insecurities that extend deeper than just the relationship and negatively impact your future interactions with others. Likewise, being too demanding or expecting too much from others can lead to disappointments that hurt more than they help. Love takes work, but it’s worth it. Ultimately, it’s about being there for the people you care about – and sometimes that means sacrificing your own desires for theirs.