The Different Meanings of Love
When we think of love, it’s usually about romantic attraction, a desire to be with another person and a commitment to them. But there are many other ways people use the word and a wide range of meanings it can have. For example, some people say they love their dog, their freedom or even God. Others believe that love is a feeling of attachment or a desire for emotional closeness, while others consider it to be a specific set of values and behaviors.
In the past, philosophers have debated what love is and how it can be defined. Some have argued that it’s simply a feeling that can’t be controlled, but other scholars have emphasized that it’s a complex set of feelings, emotions and behaviors that include attachment, trust, sacrifice and intimacy.
There is also an evolutionary foundation for love. Human offspring rely on adults for years after birth, and the bonds between parents and children are vitally important for their development.
In addition, scientists have found that our brains are wired to respond to pheromones from those we find attractive or desirable, and when we’re in the throes of falling in love, the regions of the brain associated with focus and craving are activated. This creates a chemical response that makes us feel giddy, energized and attracted to the person we’re loving.
A lot of the time, we can’t help but fall in love with someone. This is what we mean when we talk about love being a “feeling.” But this kind of love can also be destructive because it can lead to jealousy or insecurity. It can also cause you to lose perspective and make decisions you wouldn’t otherwise make.
The other way of understanding love is to see it as a choice. This kind of love is based on the belief that there are certain things that you should do for other people because they are important to you. It’s the kind of love that makes a parent or friend choose to remain committed to a person who has unhealthy patterns of behavior, for example.
This is the kind of love that you’re likely to hear about in a novel, for example. It’s a love that demands surrender and faith that the person you’re in love with will one day see your light. And it takes work to keep that light on, too. This is a big part of why couples and families often seek out individual or relationship therapy when things aren’t going well. It’s a way to reclaim the power of healthy, loving relationships.
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